Kiss and make up by James Archer

(Enter Joseph, bitter, angry and dejected.  Sits down, head in hands stage front.  Enter his Father backstage.)

Father

Joseph

Father

Joseph

Father

Joseph

Father

Joseph

Father

Joseph

Father

Voice of God (Gabriel)

Joseph

Voice of God

Joseph

Joseph!  Joseph! (No response.  Puts his hand on Joseph’s shoulder)  What’s the matter, son?  Had a tiff with Mary?

(Without looking up)  It’s off, Dad.  It’s all off.  (Abruptly gets up and starts pacing to and fro across the stage.  Father sits down and wait for him to speak)  The slut!  The little bitch! The …..

(Breaking in)  Joseph, what has she done?

I went to pick her up after work.  She was stunning.  Radiant.  Grinning like a Cheshire cat.  She’d got some amazing news for me.  Wait till we get home, dearest; I’ll tell you there.  Sits down on my lap.  Looks straight into my eyes.  Joseph, my love, she whispers, so husky;  Joseph – I’m pregnant!

(Standing up)  Good God!

(Bitterly)  That was her excuse too.  As if the truth wasn’t bad enough, she has the brass to claim she’s still a virgin!  Some cock and bull story about God being the father.  You know the stuff.  Seeing angels in the lunch break.  Overpowered by the shadow of the Almighty.  Believe that and I’ll believe anything.

I wouldn’t have dreamt it of her.  She hasn’t got the brains to make it all up!

What could I do, Dad?  Brazen hussy!  No sense of her shame!  I tore the ring – my ring – off her finger, and hurled it – smash – through the window.  She understood then.  Started blubbing her eyes out.  Clinging to my sleeve.  I couldn’t bear it any longer.

She could be stoned if the priests find out.  We must keep this secret, Joseph.

Oh yes – until she’s out like this (indicating pregnant belly) and all the town’s awhispering.  And who’ll get the blame?  Me!  For not doing the decent thing by her!  But Dad, how can I marry a woman I can’t trust?  My back’s not even turned and she’s out on the town with God knows who!

And his baby.  (Pause)  How about an abortion?  (Joseph shudders.  No answer.  Joseph sits down)  I’m sorry, son.  It’s a rum one.  But trust your Dad – he’ll think of a way out.  (Pause.  Starts to go, then looks round wistfully)  Goodnight, Jo.  (Exit)  (Pause)

Joseph!  (Joseph starts)  Yes, you.  Joseph Davidson!

Is that you, Lord?

Joseph, it’s all right.  Everything she told you is true.  You must call the boy Jesus.

(Running from stage)  Mary!  Mary!  Will you forgive me?

Editable and printable Word version